[00:00:02] Speaker A: Welcome to the Business Miracles podcast. I'm Heather Dominick, founder of Businessmiracles.com comma, and author of the book the highly sensitive leadership Revolution.
[email protected] since 2010, I've been training highly sensitive entrepreneurs and leaders from around the globe to work less while making more impact and income by doing things differently. I'm so glad you joined me. Listen in and get ready. Get ready for a shift in the way you view yourself, your work, your life. A Business Miracle this is a course in Business Miracles podcast. Episode 158 mastering change on today's episode, I'm teaching you what you really need to master your highly sensitive nervous system when faced with change. Also, you can use the choice points of change as opportunities to create betterment in your business, your life, and in the world.
[00:01:10] Speaker B: Resistance to resilience revisited so let's start with, wait for it, some definitions so, the definition of resistance, according to the Webster dictionary, is the refusal to accept or comply with something, the attempt to prevent something by action or argument.
And I'll share that again, the refusal to accept or comply with something, the attempt to prevent something by action or argument, and the definition of resilience, the capacity to withstand or to recover quickly from difficulties.
And again, resilience, the capacity to withstand or to recover quickly from difficulties.
I'd like to throw in one more definition, and that is the definition of equanimity.
Equanimity, a mental calmness, composure, and evenness of temper, especially in a difficult situation.
And one more equanimity, mental calmness, composure, and evenness of temper, especially in a difficult situation.
Let's take a breath in.
[00:02:54] Speaker C: And let it out.
[00:02:56] Speaker B: So why is it of value to revisit resistance to resilience, especially now?
Well, according to the Economist, since 2020 there has been a global loss of life, four times greater than the annual average of deaths per year pre 2020.
Few weeks ago, I was reading the New York Times, the I think they called it the coronavirus or Pandemic newsletter, and something I had been reading like a weekly email since the start of the pandemic. And this email was letting readers know that they were foregoing the newsletter and that the last issue would be coming out. Because though there's still effects of the pandemic, there was less to report on.
Part of what I loved about this newsletter through the pandemic is that there was always a section at the bottom of the newsletter where readers were writing in answers to questions that the newsletter journalists had been asking and sharing their experiences of the pandemic. And I really appreciated that section of the newsletter, because people would write in from all over, you know, all across the United States, around the world. And I just found it, you know, supportive and soothing, nurturing as well as informative. What other people were experiencing, experiencing for this last newsletter, they posed this question. The question was, how has this once in a generation pandemic impacted your life?
And I read that question, and I literally, just uncontrollably, spontaneously burst into tears when I read that question, and I turned to inquiry. It's like, whoa, what's happening?
What is this about? And it was the emphasis of once in a generation.
And that impact really, really hit me right into my heart.
So whatever the pandemic has been like for you in your area from 2020 till now, and maybe for you, it's been as if, you know, the pandemic was over a long time ago. Regardless, the world is registering the reverberation.
Most people aren't aware of it, and definitely most people are not acknowledging it yet.
Guess who's most likely feeling it? We are as highly sensitive, and specifically as highly sensitive leaders.
The theme of the next four months, pay attention and be aware. You might want to rewrite that down.
[00:06:29] Speaker C: Or write that down for the first time.
[00:06:31] Speaker B: Pay attention and be aware.
Resistance is having your back to the ocean.
Resilience is the willingness to face the waves.
Having your back to the ocean. Resistance increases the probability that you will get struck by a sleeper wave.
It'll come and take you out as if it is out of nowhere.
Resilience, the willingness to face the waves and not get struck by a sleeper.
Breath in.
[00:07:19] Speaker C: And let it out.
[00:07:23] Speaker B: To be unaware.
As an untrained, highly sensitive, whatever it is that might be happening in your life, your world. The untrained, highly sensitive says, this is happening to me.
I am angry, sad, resentful, tired, and I'm going to act it out or lash out. Or lash in.
Choice point to shame.
Judgment. Criticism. Superego. Voice overprotection.
Shadows. Coping cycle. Resistance, anxiety, fear, lack of safety. I won't be able to handle it. Stop. Choice point. Shame. Judgment. Criticism. Superego voice.
Breath in and let it out.
To choose to be aware.
The trained, highly sensitive hits a choice point and says, this is happening for me.
I am still angry, sad, resentful, tired, and I am going to use energy management tools.
I am going to inquire, what am I meant to learn?
How am I meant to change?
How can I use this experience to be of service to others?
I am going to access equanimity and I am going to get to work creating betterment, persistence, perseverance, purposefulness, community core practice, consistency, highly sensitive strengths and resilience to the IUK process to back to resilience.
Breath in.
[00:09:51] Speaker C: And let it out.
[00:09:56] Speaker B: So recently I received an Instagram voice message and this Instagram voice message was from a little young thing in France who said that she had just discovered me and my work serving highly sensitive entrepreneurs. And on her message she said, I'm reaching out to you because I've recently chosen this niche for myself to serve highly sensitive entrepreneurs in France and I wanted to know, is it viable? Can you actually be successful? Have a successful business serving this niche?
So this little voicemail had me thinking back over my own experience.
It had me recalling 911 when I lived just over a mile from ground zero. Working as a teacher in a school had just started at this new school and everything that unfolded from that day forward, including because of 911, having to declare personal bankruptcy that following year. Since work that I relied on to pay my bills in addition to my teaching salary dried up, disappeared, choosing because of 911 to leave the confinement of the traditional classroom and start my own business in the midst of personal bankruptcy. How I experienced 13 deaths in my first ten years of being self employed and not like cousins, four time removed death close to me. Grandparents, uncles, best college friend died at 35, lung cancer, never smoked a day in her life.
How I experienced three surgeries, one which was brought about because of a life threatening situation from 2015 to 2022. How I went through four moves through 2020 and 2021. And now I am faced with the possibility that I'm going to have to move again. Not by choice. It's a legal situation. It's nasty. It's disheartening in terms of a sense of humanity and justice and fairness.
And through it all, over these last 20 years, I've served, supported, shared, taught, coached, mentored.
I've hired and I've fired. I have faced choice point after choice point after choice point.
And I am still here.
So I haven't responded to that little young thing from France yet. But when I do, my plan is to tell her, you can't teach what you're not yet living.
We can turn our back, or we can face the ocean, and it's going to show up in all ways. For some of us, it's immense personal loss or accidents or addictions or unwanted moves.
I remember taking a moonlit walk with HSL member Ennis during our quantum leap retreat in the fall of 2022 last year and sharing with her that I receive a today in history email every day.
And I receive a today in history email from the History Channel every day as a reminder that we are not the first to go through exceptional times, and yet we can fool ourselves into believing that we are. We can fool ourselves into slipping into resistance, resentment, drama, persecution, victimhood.
Yet with every occurrence, we always have a choice.
And if your choice is to be empowered as a highly sensitive entrepreneur and leader, then you will do the work to access resilience and that will be your greatest path to abundance, financially and otherwise.
Whatever it is that continues to come our way. The choice for resilience and equanimity is always there. And if you are committed to being trained and high functioning as a highly sensitive, you will welcome the opportunity for the choice point to shift from resistance to resilience. If we go back to the definition of resistance, the refusal to accept or comply with something, the attempt to prevent something by action or argument, so what is to be gained by staying in resistance?
What is the value of resisting your own self, your own heart? What it is that you say that you want?
The choice is always yours.
[00:16:06] Speaker D: Thank you for being a part of this business Miracles podcast episode and for beginning to dip your toe into the journey of highly sensitive leadership training. If you are ready to truly use your sensitivities as strengths in all parts of your work and life, I invite you to connect for a one on one chat. You will experience being deeply listened to, and together we'll get a sense of whether the highly sensitive leadership training programs are the best next step for you and your highly sensitive journey. At this time, just go to www.claritycall.com.com to schedule a conversation. We so look forward to connecting with you. Talk to you soon.
