[00:00:02] Speaker A: Welcome to the Business Miracles podcast. I'm Heather Dominick, founder of Businessmiracles.com comma and author of the book the Highly Sensitive leadership Revolution.
[email protected]. since 2010, I've been training highly sensitive entrepreneurs and leaders from around the globe to work less while making more impact and income by doing things differently. I'm so glad you joined me. Listen in and get ready. Get ready for a shift in the way you view yourself, your work, your life. A business miracle.
[00:00:39] Speaker B: In this episode, I discuss how this.
[00:00:42] Speaker C: Teaching is necessary now more than ever, to support you as an HSP in business and leadership so that you can access resilience through grace and grit, and.
[00:00:53] Speaker B: How the root of most highly sensitive.
[00:00:55] Speaker C: Resistance is not overwhelm, but the fear of even the possibility of overwhelm. I also go over the three key elements that will support you with being able to continue to access resilience rather than being triggered into your highly sensitive.
[00:01:11] Speaker B: Shadows and coping mechanism.
[00:01:13] Speaker C: Because if one thing is clear, change is here to stay. And we don't want this quickening to keep you from living your purpose and answering your HSP calling.
[00:01:24] Speaker B: We want it to support you because.
[00:01:27] Speaker C: You and your specific HSP gifts and talents are very much needed.
Let's dive in together.
[00:01:41] Speaker B: We are here to focus in on the topic of roots of resistance.
So the business miracles path from resistance to resilience is teaching that I introduced at the fall 2017 in person training.
[00:01:59] Speaker D: Retreat.
[00:02:02] Speaker B: And it feels like forever ago.
There is so much. There is so much that has changed in our world since the introduction of this teaching. Yet our nervous system wiring as highly sensitive remains the same.
Now, the bottom of this chart, the words choice point hover in between shame and grace.
We are being brought to choice points more frequently and more quickly than most of us have ever experienced in our lifetimes.
We are definitely being brought to choice points more frequently and more quickly than we were in 2017 at this particular moment.
This is a particular choice point at the midpoint of a turning point, the collective turning point is an experience that we are in the midst of here and now.
So at this point, your resilience will be challenged.
Your resilience is being challenged.
Yet now is the time for three particular elements to consciously be cultivating in order to continue to access resilience.
And here are those three points. Point number one, courage.
Point number two, determination.
Point number three, flexibility.
Courage is for moving forward into your.
[00:04:19] Speaker D: Next step.
[00:04:22] Speaker B: Not courage to conquer all.
Next step, determination is for doing whatever it takes to follow through, not distraction.
Determination, not getting it all done perfectly, doing whatever it takes to follow through.
Flexibility is for adjusting and refining as needed during this erratic, an unpredictable time.
This moment is a good time to plan ahead, but with adjustments when necessary.
Right now, in this collective experience at this time, you will experience attention created by seemingly opposing influences, pushing and pulling and pulling and pushing and forcing decisions that you may not feel ready for yet.
Tension can be a proactive energy that fuels change and inspires you to action.
It comes down to what do you choose?
Is it to default to shadows and coping mechanisms fueled by shame, activated due to the tension?
Now why would we do that? If this tension is collective, which I'm sure we can all look around us here and now, wherever it is that each one of us lives and we see, and as highly sensitives, we feel the tension. It's everywhere. Everyone's experiencing it right now.
As highly sensitives, when we are untrained, we interpret that tension as our fault.
It's that unconscious interpretation based only on previous nervous system experience that will trigger us into those shadows and into those coping mechanisms.
Or will you choose, grace, will you choose to answer the call of this midpoint, of this turning point and utilize this choice point to master this particular aspect of your nervous system functioning?
Meaning tension can be a proactive energy that fuels change and inspires you to action, inspires you into resilience.
Speaking to a very common, highly sensitive experience, which is fear of even the possibility of overwhelm.
Fear of even the possibility of overwhelm. Not the fear of overwhelm, the fear of even the possibility of overwhelm.
It's this fear that is at the root of most highly sensitive resistance.
According to Doctor Elaine Aron, founding researcher of the highly sensitive person for HSP's, we have known what she refers to as unbearable emotions.
Unbearable emotions is that explanation of the fear of I won't be able to handle it.
According to Doctor Aaron, unbearable emotions is what causes highly sensitives to be even more cautious about every aspect of life.
In my language, the highly sensitive entrepreneur and leader shadow of overprotection, Doctor Aaron also says, but alas, her words, strategies to avoid unbearable emotions truly limit life.
My words defaulting to coping mechanisms.
According to Doctor Aaron, she says, we fear what has already happened to us.
That is, fears are learned.
[00:09:59] Speaker D: But sometimes.
[00:10:01] Speaker B: According to Doctor Aaron, we don't remember having had an unbearable emotion. So we don't know we learned this fear.
Also, according to Doctor Aaron, she says, I think most often unbearable emotions happen in infancy when we certainly don't remember that she goes on to say, whatever the source, conscious or unconscious memories, fears of what were at the time of unbearable emotions can truly play havoc with life.
We set up defenses against such pain that we dont even know about.
And this is the fear of even the possibility of overwhelm, the root of most highly sensitive resistance.
Now, for myself, when I first discovered this concept and this work of unbearable.
[00:11:08] Speaker D: Emotions and the fear of even the.
[00:11:10] Speaker B: Possibility of overwhelm, for myself, this discovery was over a decade ago.
I made a choice. I did not want to live beholden and imprisoned by this fear.
So I developed, based on auto writing guidance, my original first what I called.
[00:11:35] Speaker D: 100 days of dedication.
[00:11:38] Speaker B: It was a core practice that I committed to consistently.
So then the question becomes again, what do we choose at this point?
And if you choose the path of resilience, if you choose grace and grit.
[00:12:03] Speaker D: In the midst of these exceptional times.
[00:12:07] Speaker B: Then it's important to be very clear about how you are going to be in action.
How are you going to choose to access resilience through grace and grit?
We turn to the tools designed specifically for us as highly sensitive entrepreneurs and leaders.
You turn to the tools as the way of your how.
Especially because now more than ever, you will be tempted by the way of the 80% that tension is uncomfortable.
So now more than ever, you will be tempted by outside influences. You will be tempted by what your friends are doing. You will be tempted by what your family members are doing. You will be tempted by the shininess of other programs. You will be seduced by the superego voice and thoughts in your mind of there must be a way around myself as a highly sensitive there must be another way.
Yet at the end of the day, you will still be you. Your nervous system will still be highly sensitive, and at the end of the day, you will be faced with resistance as an opportunity to be called up into the privilege of agency, of owning who you are and learning how to work with who you are.
So here are two particular hows. If you choose the path of resilience, if you choose grace and grit.
Number one, auto writing.
These are questions that I worked with in my original 100 days of dedication to move through that fear of the possibility of even being overwhelmed. Auto writing question number one, what do I need to know to feel safe today? So I will take action to grow my business?
What do I need to know to feel safe today? So I will take action to grow my business.
And then, if needed, if I needed more clarity or more specificity based on the response I received from that first auto writing question, I would follow up with this second question.
What exact growth action do I need to take today?
What exact growth action do I need to take today?
And if I was resistant to the answer I received to that second question, I would ask show me how to release my resistance to taking this action.
Show me how to release my resistance.
[00:15:20] Speaker D: To taking this action.
[00:15:23] Speaker B: Tool number two the second how your weekly, monthly quarterly assessment.
You can use this approach either weekly, monthly, or quarterly.
For myself, at the end of each week, as I am updating and preparing my next week's four Q focus, I ask myself this where is my resistance?
Where is my resistance?
This is my response to the things that got lost, missed, avoided.
This is my response to the items that are rolled over week after week if needed. I ask that same question reviewing a full month.
And I always ask that question as an assessment at the end of a plan before going into my next four Q plan.
And if I really find myself mired in resistance, I turn to ancestral support. For inspiration, I look to others who have created something out of nothing.
Some of my most recent favorites Maya Angelou, Dolly Parton, Julia Child.
You think you're the first one to go through some difficult times?
You think we're the first ones to face such collective global turbulence?
Will you choose to fall prey to the fear that the media feeds on and outside circumstances?
[00:17:43] Speaker D: Or will you choose to put in.
[00:17:45] Speaker B: Place core practices and tools to manage your own relationship with the fear of the possibility of overwhelm resistance and choice points.
Bottom line, what do you choose?
Breath in and let it out.
[00:18:16] Speaker E: Thank you for being a part of this business Miracles podcast episode and for beginning to dip your toe into to the journey of highly sensitive leadership training. If you are ready to truly use your sensitivities as strengths in all parts of your work and life, I invite you to connect for a one on one chat. You will experience being deeply listened to, and together we'll get a sense of whether the highly sensitive leadership training programs are the best next step for you and your highly sensitive journey. At this time, just go to wWe www.claritycall.com to schedule a conversation. We so look forward to connecting with you. Talk to you soon.
